Posted by Missy on March 17, 2002 at 23:25:49:
In Reply to: explosive friends posted by sarah67zillion on March 10, 2002 at 01:21:21:
are you okay w/ being a free therapist for your friends? :) JK
I know what you are talking about. I used to have friends like that, that did nothing but tell me all about their problems. I had no problems w/ it for a while cuz I liked the attention. But after a while talking with these people became too much effort. So I told them to talk about something else and they couldn't, so I told them to go talk to someone else about their problems. Cuz I had my fill of having them bring me down w/ their ongoing problems. them telling me about their problems was not so bad, the thing was that is all they talked about. Imagine being around a bunch of negative and pestmistic people all the time and see if you don't become bothered. heh
If you don't mind it, kudos to you. that's great.
: something i've only recently realized:
: for several years, but especially in the last few years since i've been bouncing around the US, i get a call or mesg on my VM almost everyday from an X, a friend or family member about something they've had to tell me for the longest time, or for what ever reason, they just feel they need to get something off their chest. and it's not always people that i haven't talked to for a long time. quite often it's from people who i talk to on, at least, a weekly basis. i mean, its usually good encouraging stuff, but not always. and im not complaining, but its always some big emotional thing that has been festering up for a while in them, but not so much in me. never the less, it ends up throwing me off.
: i never really gave the frequency of these calls a second thought, much less a catagory of "these calls." but now that i have taken notice, it makes me wonder, am i the kind of person that people feel they need to reassure all the time? i mean, i do love a good reassurement session from my peeps, but i can make it through a day without one. i wonder why people don't just tell me this kind of stuff casually. why do they feel they must make a formal phone call in order to address such issues as "i just want you to know, i'm proud of you" or "i'm sorry you think im a leech, but..." or "i just want you to know, i meant what i said when..." or "i admire what you're doing" or "i think you're just too scared to be loved and stay in one place" or whatever else they have to say to me?
: i considered the egram types of my long lost Xboy/girl friends, bestfriends, long-distance amigos, and the family members who have been in the formal caller crew...yep, mostly 4s. that probably explains a lot. also some 3s and 6w5s, couple 2s, a light sprinkle of 8s...
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