Posted by Sharlee (188.8.131.52) on September 19, 2003 at 23:17:15:
In Reply to: Re: Quick suicide question posted by Aweekleft (184.108.40.206) on September 19, 2003 at 17:10:59:
> You have a valid point with the diabetes thing but allow me to take it and run with it. What if I was constantly on MDMA (ecstacy), and when on X everything was wonderful and I shared empathy with my fellow man and felt a deep bond to all those around me on a human level. To most people that would be 'wrong' and 'false' as a daily way of life becuse how you feel in that state isn't the real you. That's how I feel about prozac and other mood enhancers. While on them, you aren't dealing with the real you but an altered version of you. In both cases, as soon as the drug wears off you're back to square one.
#### I haven't taken Ecstacy or antidepressants so I can't comment on how they feel. I have seen however marked improvements for the better in people that take medication and vice versa. The difference between your ecstacy example and antidepressants is that antidepressants are bringing transmitter levels back to the normal state. If ecstacy also does that, that's fine but I suspect ecstacy alters the normal state. There is a difference. Don't you want to feel normal?
> .....They say the same things 'it will get better' and 'im here for you'. Although they mean the best, it won't get better, it only gets worse and there's nothing they can do about it.
##### Your friends are (probably) not trained therapists and I doubt a therapist would say that to you. Of course things may not get better and noone will promise you that. However, the point is that you don't know any more than they do and all states whether happy or sad pass. "This too shall pass" is a true saying.
> And lastly, why on earth would I want to meet the 'partner of my dreams' like this? Would I really be doing them a favor or enhancing their life in any way? .. Seeking happy-ness through another person is co-dependant and unfair.
### You are right and I wasn't suggesting that this wouldbe the answer to your problems. But its a good thing to happen and why do you think you do not deserve a good thing to happen to you?
>To your last point, what if it's my death that triggers the major revelation?
### And what if it isn't? Its one act which may or not give a revelation. On the other hand, you have a potential another 70 years to do lots of acts that can bring revelations to people, if that's what you want. Society would want it.
>This is the last time I'm coming to this thread. I've made up my mind and found what I was looking for. Don't think there was something you could have said because my mind was made up before I came here, just needed some logistical information. The more I talked it over the clearer the solution became to me.
### Well, I hope you come back to read the thread anyway before you do the deed. Obviously a few of us here think it is a very wrong step for you to take. A professional once said to me that the problem with mental illness is that it deceives its own logic into thinking that its mind knows best. This makes it all the more difficult to treat mental illness. So, while giving advice is not a recommended way of problem solving for others, here's mine for what it is worth:
1. Give yourself another chance
2. See a therapist/psychiatrist with whom you have rapport (if the first does not suit, change)
3. Think of a future where everything was to your liking. Forget about the barriers, think of everything that would be great for you. Write it down and just look at that every day and think about it. Positive thinking and visualising are very powerful.
All the best
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