Baron & Wagele - Are You My Type, Am I yours?
 

The Asserter (the Eight)

Asserters are powerful and not afraid to express their anger.

Self-Preservation Eights: "Satisfactory Survival"

  • I keep myself supplied with plenty of food, comforts, and emergency supplies.
  • Independence and security are very important to me; I don' want to rely on others for money or anything else.
  • I get out of sorts when the details of my life are not in order and when access to what I am used to or want is cut off.
  • A main theme in my life is protection -- of myself, of my belongings, and of others.
  • I feel safer when I sit where I can observe everything going on in the room.
  • I try to make certain that no one will sneak up or intrude upon me.

Relational Eights: "Possession and Surrender"
Relational Eights, especially males, are the most excessive of all the subtypes.

  • I am too assertive for some. I prefer high energy and intensity to the deadness of the comfort zone.
  • My needs to possess and surrender are interwoven. I can be soft and vulnerable if I trust the person I am with, yet I never completely lose the impulse to command.
  • I'm often in conflict about wanting a partner who needs to be taken care of versus wanting one I respect who will stand his or her ground against me.
  • One way to get on my bad side is to neglet to consult me or ask my opinion about a matter that directly or indirectly involves me.
  • It irritates me when people withhold their emotions or thoughts from me, espeially when we are trying to work through a problem.
  • I am attracted to people who are direct and who are not allergic to confrontation.
  • I feel closer to my partner when we fight, beause fighting brings out the truth, but constant arguing can burn me out of a relationship.
  • I take precautions to make sure that no one tries to pull a power play on me or threaten my relationship.

Social Eights: "Friend or Foe?"

  • I can't let my guard down until I know where I stand and that I'm respected.
  • I test my friends for their loyalty. Once trust is firmly established, I usually stay in friendships for life.
  • When in a group, I focus on who else has power in order to maintain my authority.
  • I will go to bat for my friends and the weaker members of the community, but I want them to try to develop self-reliance and get back on their feet again.
  • I try to be loyal and work problems out, but if someone walks over the line and betrays my trust, I may cut him or her out of my life forever.
  • I love the excitement of a righteous struggle for truth or fairness.
  • I usually take the role of protector in a group and make sure that justice is upheld.

Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele

Are You My Type, Am I Yours?
Relationships Made Easy Through the Enneagram
HarperSanFrancisco, 1995, 184 pages