Posted by Flower Pagan (220.127.116.11) on March 16, 2003 at 17:16:07:
In Reply to: HOW CAN I BE CONTENT? posted by JACK (18.104.22.168) on March 16, 2003 at 08:20:46:
> AS I'VE TOLD YOU,I HAVE HAD ETERNAL CONFLICT WITH MY MOTHER.
> THE QUESTION IS --DOESN'T SHE HAS TO PAY BACK FOR ALL THE SIN SHE HAD DONE TO ME?HOW CAN I BE CONTENT WITH THAT?WHERE IS THE JUSTICE?
Hi Jack, I know it is wrong what your mother have done to you, and her sins are God's concern and leave it with God to deal with her sins.
Jack, my mother have hurt me all of my life with her bitterness of her words. As I became an adult, I have learned that my mother was in pain from her childhood as well. She was emotionally abused by her Step-mother. Her real mother died when she was 4 years old. My mother left home after 7th grade to get away from the abuse. She had that pain in her heart all of her life and had more people to hurt her as she grew older. She has never healed, so she continue to hurt others with her own inner pain. She does help people and have a big heart who would give you her hurt if it is going to save you, but she also gives you her bitterness because she is hurting, just like you are.
I am fortunate that I did not become bitter from all of my childhood hurts. The difference between my mother and I, was that I lived my life for God and she did not. She drink and cuss a lot! I am beginning to understand that my mother needs prayer and she needs God to heal her of her pain and her bitterness. She believes in God, but does not live for God. She tries to escape her pain, instead of dealing with her pain, so she hurt others as she is feeling hurt inside.
Jack, the justice is in God's hands. How could you be content with that, I am going to tell you something that I am relearning all over again! You need to take your pain and your hurts to God and tell God how you feel and ask God to help you to heal and to help you to forgive your mother. Forgiveness is a gift to yourself because you will be far happier! Jack, do you want to have children and pass the pain of your hurts onto them as your mother have done to you? You can start healing now and let God help you to end your pain.
This may not make any sense to you and that will be okay.
Psalm 107: 19-21 (NKJV)
19. They cried out to the LORD in their trouble,
And He saved them out of their distresses. (He will save you, Jack, of your distress with your mother.
20. He sent his word and healed them,
And delivered healed them from their destructions.
21. Oh, that men would give thanks to to the LORD for HiS goodness,
And for His wonderful works to the children of men! (including you, Jack)
Read God's word and pray as you seek healing through prayer. Seek answers and you will find your answers. Is it worth living a life of anger?
Here is someone who is into healing and the Enneagram for starters. Check out http://www.hurleydobson.com Considering buying their books. If you ever visit my group, please, feel free to check out the links where I have a folder on Enneagram books written by Christian Authors. Perhaps, you will find it helpful. I will give you one link to a list of books here.
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