Posted by Margaret (126.96.36.199) on March 26, 2003 at 19:49:40:
In Reply to: Re: my god, what has happened to me? posted by froggyTheFrog (188.8.131.52) on March 26, 2003 at 19:01:15:
Froggy, thank you so much for your patience and understanding. Your advice is really intelligent. Your advice is really right. I've thought about it,
and, first, I need to say, I feel bad for being too hard on my co-workers yesterday. They aren't that bad afterall. I just got frustrated with no privacy at home to restore my energy for work the next day, that's all. They are actually really good people. I didn't mean to put them down. I'm sorry I said that. They're not 'worse' than my previous office. Not at all. They're human beings. And, yeah, they are cool. Today was a better day for me. There was more laughter today than before. I definitely don't want to leave them. I really do like everyone there. And, business-wise, darn, they are obviously doing the heardest job of all, selling to the customers. I am so relieved I no longer have to deal with customers. I forgot how much better off I have it compared to before afterall. That's definitely a good thing in my life. A much job than before, definitely. I definitely don't want to lose this. Definitely. And the people I work with. That's the second good thing. I hope to continue working in this business (company) with all these people, because they really are good to be around. I really do like them.
I just need to get better at managing my time and prioritizing, that's all.And I will, in due time. I don't want to lose this job, I really like it. It's definitely what I want. And I liek the people. Now that this month is over, now month will be much better (more manageable), I'm sure.
As far as the greatest 'evil' in my life, I would say it's where I live. I gotto get out of that house. I can't stand being there anymore. It's so crowded. No privacy to come home too after a job like this, that's what's killing me, it's the complete lack of privacy ad 'space' the I don't have when I come home, not the work during the day. The day is good, the office is good. I like working hard. I just need total and complete privacy when I come home at night (as well as on the weekends), that's all.
And if I don't get it when I get home, I go nuts. I really go nuts. My sanity is restored when alone (with no noise). When deprived of solitude, I go bonkers.
The transition you suggest, it's moving somewhere more rural, more isolated. Ideal would be my own little shack with no other people living in it. But that is hard to do on my budget, if not impossible.
When I get that, I will finally be content. That is my milestone. it really is. And I can't wait. I really can't.
Thank you for your listening and advice. That was so nice of you. I really needed to 'vent'. I really needed someone to listen. Thank you so much. I really needed that. I really needed that.
> Sorry I waited so long to answer you. I have been considering what exactly I should tell you. It seems that you have been experiencing a shock similar to a recent shock of mine on a much bigger scale. This might seem like a big nightmare, but there are still good things in your life. Now, would probably be a good time to think of three good things in your life, and write them down. The purpose of doing that is to rescue your perspective on life. As P said, a lot of how this affects you is your perception of the matter.
> Do you know what you want out of life, Margaret, or are you wandering? There is one really good thing about you that will help you out of your current situation a great deal. You have demonstrated you have the ability to change things. You've uprooted yourself and brought yourself to where you are now. Rather than totally uprooting yourself this time, how baout changing one aspect of your life at a time, and giving yourself time to adapt? For example, which is the greater evil to you in your life? The place you live or your job? Are there other places for rent in your area? Are there other possible jobs in your area? Try to make smaller transitions that probably won't be "perfect", but that might improve your situation. As you make these transitions, try to keep the good parts of your life in your perspective too. At the same time, try to clearly define what you want where you can. If you are like me, there is really no way to figure out your life plan (and I don't really want to). But it would be nice to know what your expectations really are (and not be caught in the trap of "more", "better", and "faster" -- where you will always be dissatisfied), and how you are trying to meet those expectations. Also, realize that you're not going to get what you want in one foul swoop. You need to set milestones, and give yourself a lot of credit when you reach them. You've demonstrated you're not a failure at all by your ability to change. We're only failures when it is all over, and it is not all over.
> I hope that this helps. In a nutshell, "Keep a positive outlook". It makes a lot more difference than most people give it credit for.
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