Posted by Rho (22.214.171.124) on May 05, 2003 at 19:27:29:
In Reply to: My Life Sucks posted by raz62 (126.96.36.199) on May 05, 2003 at 11:27:50:
> First of all, I am either completely ignored (usually) or, only when someone needs something from me, treated like a stupid sucker who will do a $50K job for $30K just because I guess they think I'm so nice and stupid I won't say no. Well, I did say no this morning but added that I would do it if I got paid the same as the guy who was let go last week. The person asking me just kind of changed the subject after that.
**** that's a start. & work on your resume - *off work hours* of course. Then start putting out feelers for a job. Even if you don't get offers tomorrow, it will give you the feeling that you have options, and that means confidence. It should also help you to get a feel for your market value - if you know for sure that you are worth 50K, you can demand that with a lot more confidence. (Don't forget, with this economy, a 50K job is now worth 40K :(
> the blue collar guys in my neighborhood (my significant other being one of them)
BLESSING 1 - you *have* a significant other
even if I am more qualified (which I am) to actually assist someone on a trip with presentations and the like.
**** If you are more qualifed, a good company would choose you. Reason #2 to start looking for work.
> But the funny thing is, I felt better about who I was on the weekend -- like a warrioress protecting my family; plus it was a lovely weekend and we just hung out in parks and playgrounds the whole time
Blessing 2 -- see how good you feel about yourself,
Blessing 3 -- you know how to appreciate what is real in life, and let it lift your mood!
About your appartment, well, it is time to get out of there, anyway, I bet, and this was what you needed to give you the push.
I'm 37 (38 in two months) - I only wish i had a signigicant other and a child. But I have arrived at a point where i am getting that maintenance thing down. SInce I have been accepted into music school, and have decided to go, really, since finally admitting that what I want to do is be a singer/songwriter, a lot of my misery and unhappiness that I got stuck in has fallen away, but it comes back, it comes back. I find it is a constant process of watching, modifying etc. Sometimes my deep nature is too strong and that - 'I am unique, unique in my damage' thing just rears its head and it is too strong, I can't get out. BUt I remember that our thought affect our moods, and we need to think positive thoughts to get us out of negative moods.
Today I threw away the business card of a guy I met last week. I erased his phone number from my phone book and call history. I feel like I put myself out as much as is possible for me, and I can see that he is just not that motivated. so ...
Now the challenge is for me to distract myself from this thing that keeps proving to me that I can never be loved. :(
count your mitzvahs - (blessings)
and remember, HEALTH more that beauty is a big one!!!
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