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Re: Ultimate challenge for a 4/3
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Re: Ultimate challenge for a 4/3

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Posted by Patrick ( on June 17, 2003 at 12:23:17:

In Reply to: Ultimate challenge for a 4/3 posted by TheBlob ( on June 17, 2003 at 09:11:14:

> While the untimate challenge for a 4/5 might be how to remain totally true to oneself without cutting oneself off from the rest of humanity (I'm guessing that isolating oneself is the biggest danger for the 4/5), I've been seeing a crystal-clear vision of the 4/3 challenge -- how to be true to oneself and still be a "winner" without letting others start controlling our ideas of what a "winner" is. It's a battle that goes on constantly in my mind. Any ideas from 4s, either wing?

Sounds about right to me. But as a 4/5, I don't perceive isolation as necessarily a danger. With 4 and 5 both being "withdrawn" types, some degree of isolation is a given--and it's usually welcome!

Maybe the 4/3 wonders, "How can I drop all these masks and still function in the world?" And the 4/5 wonders, "How can I know my true self when all I ever see is a reflected self-image? The very act of looking seems to undermine self-actualization (just being oneself)."

The 4/3 has more of an outward-looking perspective, I would guess, since the 3 energy is more aggressive and socially conscious. My experience of being a 4/5 is that the external world is almost always sort of a distant subject of study--more to be observed than involved in.

Isolation may be something of a danger for all three of the "withdrawn" types (4,5, and 9). But I'd say the real dangers are the disorders covered by Riso in his descriptions of "unhealthy" types--those in the lower "levels of understanding."

Challenges are different than dangers, though. I think my 4/5 challenge may be to "stop imagining life and start living it," as Riso put it. In other words, stop creating mental models and images in an effort to understand oneself and life, because such models and images (including the enneagram itself) can only be artificial, never genuine and natural.

But as with all challenges, one has to indulge for a while until he grows tired or frustrated and is ready for a change. In the meantime, I thrive on my imaginative self-image and mental models of how life works; and I'm usually content to stand aloof and observe life.


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