Posted by cj (22.214.171.124) on June 22, 2003 at 22:33:58:
In Reply to: what to do with a mother's love? posted by Margaret (126.96.36.199) on June 20, 2003 at 00:43:04:
I have a mother who is similar in her treatment of me, and always has been since I was a little girl. Mean, nasty, negative, neglectful...
I.E.: when I was 18 I went through an extremely dangerous depressive phase wherein I was suicidal and called her for help (MISTAKE!!) and she told me to look in the phone book for a psychiatrist because: "there is nothing I can do for you, there is something wrong with you". I have since been through a LOT of SHIT in my life getting past that feeling that I deserved to be miserable and that I was a defective human being. Thank God that I have, by virtue of some very caring friends and an excellent therapist. Anyway...
Get away and stay away from her. Period. There is nothing you can do to heal whatever hurts she has experienced to make her a more empathetic caring person. The only person's behavior you can control is your own, and if she is that hurtful and detrimental to you, move away (emotionally and physically) from her. Get a good therapist, it can make an amazing difference. Just having someone listen to your stories an be able to tell you that you are strong for having survived it, it means a ton.
Take care and be strong!
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