Posted by The4Blob (184.108.40.206) on August 14, 2003 at 14:19:05:
In Reply to: Re: 4/3 soc/sx - baffled by workplace social rejec~ posted by Dee (220.127.116.11) on August 14, 2003 at 13:44:56:
> These people you work with don't give you any thought, so why are you giving them any thought? I know, we are Type 4 and do this shit but when you step out of the box, you'll see how insignificant all this really is compared to the big picture. When I speak, I'm speaking from experience, not just off the top of my head. I'm going to tell you a little story. There was this women I had worked with who I COULD NOT STAND! SHE was so annoying and insensitive. I had problems going on and SHE would always make my problems worse. I would go home and tell my boyfriend about the things SHE said that day, or what SHE had done to piss me off. Long story short is that I went to a baby shower and SHE was there. I had no idea she was related to a friend of mine. Anyway, she came up to me and said "you're name's Dee right?" I said, yes and your name is Brittany. she said " I think you are one of the nicest people in our department, I wish I could relax and be more like you." this blew me away! she said " our boss is my ex-boyfriend and I'm ready to quit there because I hate being around him and it probably shows." We got talking, and I relized that she isn't that bad not my favorite person still but not as bad as I thought she was. Her behavior at work remained the same but I relized that it had nothing to do with me, that's just the way she is.
> YOU HAVE TO WALK IN SOMEONE ELSE'S SHOES. UNTIL YOU HAVE, YOU HAVE NO OPINION ON THEM, AND SHOULD NOT JUDGE. WORKS BOTH WAYS.
>>>>>>(((I'm embarassed.))) I will try to keep that stuff in mind
-- I remember hating someone I worked with and then finding out from my boss that he had praised me and said I was doing an outstanding job -- here all that time I thought he didn't notice or appreciate me.
Now let me still counter the above: sometimes people ARE rude and need to be confronted. But since you (I) can't force someone to include me in their social plans, the next best thing is to socialize with those who DO include me.
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