Posted by schrips (22.214.171.124) on September 01, 2003 at 14:27:02:
In Reply to: Re: shamed by emotions? posted by Raz62 (126.96.36.199) on August 27, 2003 at 20:59:28:
yeah, i'd be out of here in a second. I feel bad for my mom, too. I love her to death, but she is also very frustrating. She complains about my dad and brother, but will never stand up to them and change things. She reads a lot of self-help books (unfortunately religious in nature, which I think only exacerbates her problem of being the subservient wife, but that is an argument for another time) and has been told numerous times (by me, my brother, the psychiatrist she worked for a few years ago) that she needs to stand up for herself and do things JUST for her once in a while. But she never goes into action mode...I think a lot of people use self-help books and the like as a substitute for the real emotional roto-rooter work that needs to be done. But I don't really know how to help her with that. I've been the shoulder to cry on forever...if I try to push her, she just shuts down.
> I am guessing that if you came into a few grand and a job you liked tomorrow, you'd be out of there (with your family). You should get away.
> I feel bad for your mother (if there is one thing that makes me flip it's men that expect the woman to do the housework even thought she works full-time) but she is an adult and has to help herself; there are self-help meetings for co-dependent people.
> More victims created by a rotten economy: women and children stuck with abusive men because they need the men for economic survival.
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