Posted by tom (184.108.40.206) on September 12, 2003 at 10:26:39:
In Reply to: Confused posted by Ed (220.127.116.11) on August 21, 2003 at 18:21:01:
I'm in the exact same boat as you, I think. I used to be all about the grades and unquestioning and such, and one day I just realized that it was all pointless and stopped caring.
the main reason i'm replying though is because I also score between a 4 and 5. i consider myself a 4w5 though, because i am more inclined to act 4. anyway, the conflict between the two does suck, and i feel for ya.
> I have taken several tests and the results have been either 4 or 5. I don't know much about this stuff but i obsessively take personality tests. i figure i am a 4w5 or 5w4. I'll explain myself a little bit: I'm a grade A slacker. I'm still in school, but in 6th grade I realized that there is no reason for anything. So basically I stopped giving a crap about getting good grades. Everyday I am made to stay after to do work that I failed to complete on time, and sometimes the work would only take at most 10 minutes to do, but I still can't do it for unknown reasons to me, so I end up staying the whole 2-3 hours. I think it is a kind of punishment to myself for another unknown reason. I'm deeply intrigued by the lives of people such as Kurt Cobain and love music such as Nirvanas. I admire they're romantic? images, and dream about one day having that type of effect on people. I play guitar and i write "poems and lyrics", but I probably suck at both, at least i think i do. i have this thing where i meet a girl i'm magnetically attracted to and i can't get my mind off of her. i usually see the girl as perfect in my head, and then realize the opposite when i get closer. when i am still attracted to a girl though i fantasize about things such as having to carry her 20 miles to a hospital and/or in a sitution where we know the world is certain to end soon but we're happy just to be with eachother, just staring at each other. i have a strong will, my mom will be bothering me weeks about cleaning my room and if i don't want to i just won't. blah blah blah. i used to burn myself with cigarette butts and lighters and i wrote suicide notes to my close family and friends a while back, but i kinda knew i wasn't going to really do it. something just comes over me. i used to take anti depressants. and blah. so what do you think? sorry for not making this in paragraphs or spaced but it's too late now, i don't feel like it! =p
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